Thursday, September 25, 2008

The Pink Stuff


When you're pregnant, 37 weeks or so, you sleep so peacefully just like when you aren't pregnant. EXCEPT for those few times every night when your acid reflux is so strong that you wake-up nearly vomiting from the acid burning a trail up your throat.

You start coughing and gagging. You run downstairs with your husband in hot pursuit trying to help in someway. Your first thought is, "I'm going to die" or "This burns so badly maybe I could just pass out until it goes away." You grab for a glass of water which does absolutely nothing. You grab for a glass of milk--calcium--there's the answer! No luck, you grab a Jolly Rancher thinking that sucking on a hard candy will coat your throat. Nothing. You make some hot chocolate. Hot chocolate--when it's still 90 degrees outside at night where you live; this is how dire the situation is.

Finally, you remember that this has happened before. Your last pregnancy, about the same time frame. What did you do that night???? OH yeah, you rushed to Wal-Mart and bought a bottle of Pepto Bismol hoping to have anything that would coat your throat and stop the burning. You run to your closet full of medication and find the bottle. Hmmm...apparently you drank a little bit more of this stuff than you remembered last time; there's only about four tablespoons or so left. You're estimating that's about how much is left; you're certainly not going to measure it. You're opting to chug it.

You open the lid and the sweet, sweet, neon pink potion coats your throat and finally brings some relief. You can finally stop coughing and gagging. This is the pregnant woman's best friend. Prilosec--how dare you let me down when I need you most!

Baby, let's call a truce. I gave up tomatoes a couple of weeks ago. Tomatoes--pizza, spaghetti, salsa, the list goes on and on. I realize there's not enough room for you and my internal organs, but we've still got a few weeks to share this body.

I commit to not only sleep on my left side like I've been doing for how many months now? I now commit to sleeping with two pillows, so that even when I do wake-up with acid in my throat--like I did again last night--all I can do is taste the vile stuff and not have it actually burn a hole out of my neck like it felt it might do.

Someone tell me again how cute a pregnant woman is?

17 comments:

Melissa said...

How horrible! I had it, but not that bad! I just made sure I took 4 tums before bed every night, but by the end I was waking up several times a night to take more. The things we do for these babies! Look on the bright side... I've heard the worse your heartburn the more hair your baby will have!

Lara said...

That is truly the worst part of the last few weeks. Ugh.

JenW said...

oh so nasty! i hated heartburn, hope the baby agrees with your truce!

Cari.Ryan Florence said...

HAHAHA!! I can totally relate!! Pregnancy is just not as glamorous as people would like to pain it to be. It's hard work!! I hope the heartburn stops soon!!!

Minharos said...

Oh, I so feel your pain. Many a night I fall asleep on the couch, wake up coughing and gagging and stagger up to bed. The worst is when you inhale it because then there's nothing you can do. You cough and cough until you throw up and then cough some more. When it finally settles down you're left with acid-reflux induced asthma. So fun!

Positively Creative! said...

Y'know I never really had it that bad, but then again I was NOT sleeping at 37 weeks or so either! I am not a happy pregnant woman, in fact I really don't like being pregnant until when I have just given birth and I think, Oh man I miss being pregnant! If I could just pop those babies out and forget the nine horrible months, I'd give my vote, but in the long run it hasn't stopped me either!!LOL!!

And YES I do have my faults...I just don't blog about those..heehee!!

The Schneider Family said...

Isn't it funny how you forget!! I mean I forgot until you just reminded me of how much fun that was!! I used to have to sleep sitting up, it would get so bad. Ugh!! I am really sorry! It's a good thing the baby will be here soon! Not soon enough huh?

MK said...

I just wanted to say, on your last post that you look fabulous, and I think you are a genius for bringing a fan to the sauna of sunday school. I love your writing.

jayne said...

You are almost done and then you will get the heartburn relief you deserve! Just focus on the SLEEP part---I forgot how exhausting newborns are.....but oh so worth it.

Dahly Mama said...

We women of the world. . . feel your pain!!!

DKAZ said...

Milk of mag-something was my best friend. I usually lose weight in the last month because my indigestion gets so bad. Happy truce!

peachytiffers said...

I know this is lame, and we talked about it today, but can you see if the Minharo's can give me access to theirs? I never had it that bad! The countdown has begun though, it's almost over!

Jack and Annie said...

UGG so sorry you are going through this! I never had this with DD and hopefully won't with the others! Especially after reading your post! LOL

Jessica Martiele said...

Oh my gosh, I LIVED off of Tums with Tyler. Sat at my desk all day every day for 4 months (mine started WAY earlier) and ate two or three tums at a sitting. Every 15 minutes. All day long. (I just couldn't bring myself to chug Pepto because the one time I sent my husband to get some he brought home the mint stuff, and after swallowing it, I vomitted blue.) You have my fullest and most complete PITY right now, and though most people have no desire to be pitied, I think pregnancy is the exception...particularly when the acidic bile is streaming from your stomach back up your throat and...anyway, good luck, and only a fortnight or so left! (Small comfort, eh?)

Heather said...

Oh man, I feel your pain!!! There is nothing worse!

citymama1 said...

ugh! definitely one of the worst parts of pregnancy! so sorry.

I was a zantac girl myself...thankfully, it always came through for me.

Julie said...

I think you are looking absolutely cute!

Sorry about the heartburn, though. Hang in there! Only a couple more weeks.

Good luck with the labor and delivery.