When you're pregnant, 37 weeks or so, you sleep so peacefully just like when you aren't pregnant. EXCEPT for those few times every night when your acid reflux is so strong that you wake-up nearly vomiting from the acid burning a trail up your throat.
You start coughing and gagging. You run downstairs with your husband in hot pursuit trying to help in someway. Your first thought is, "I'm going to die" or "This burns so badly maybe I could just pass out until it goes away." You grab for a glass of water which does absolutely nothing. You grab for a glass of milk--calcium--there's the answer! No luck, you grab a Jolly Rancher thinking that sucking on a hard candy will coat your throat. Nothing. You make some hot chocolate. Hot chocolate--when it's still 90 degrees outside at night where you live; this is how dire the situation is.
Finally, you remember that this has happened before. Your last pregnancy, about the same time frame. What did you do that night???? OH yeah, you rushed to Wal-Mart and bought a bottle of Pepto Bismol hoping to have anything that would coat your throat and stop the burning. You run to your closet full of medication and find the bottle. Hmmm...apparently you drank a little bit more of this stuff than you remembered last time; there's only about four tablespoons or so left. You're estimating that's about how much is left; you're certainly not going to measure it. You're opting to chug it.
You open the lid and the sweet, sweet, neon pink potion coats your throat and finally brings some relief. You can finally stop coughing and gagging. This is the pregnant woman's best friend. Prilosec--how dare you let me down when I need you most!
Baby, let's call a truce. I gave up tomatoes a couple of weeks ago. Tomatoes--pizza, spaghetti, salsa, the list goes on and on. I realize there's not enough room for you and my internal organs, but we've still got a few weeks to share this body.
I commit to not only sleep on my left side like I've been doing for how many months now? I now commit to sleeping with two pillows, so that even when I do wake-up with acid in my throat--like I did again last night--all I can do is taste the vile stuff and not have it actually burn a hole out of my neck like it felt it might do.
Someone tell me again how cute a pregnant woman is?