Friday, May 20, 2011

This Means WAR!!!!

I slept well last night. I think God knew I needed the rest to go out and be angry today.


Remember that beautiful garden that I posted about a couple posts ago?


Well, it's not a secret anymore. The birds discovered that I have a green thumb too.


They ate my first--first--first people!!! HUGE (it seriously weighed about a pound it was so juicy) beefsteak tomato. That made me mad. In fact I almost titled this post "Mad as Hell" but my in-laws are such gentle folks, so I'm hiding the title in here where those who only look at pictures will have no idea that that thought even went through my mind.


Let's just say that damage to crops does not get looked at lightly by anyone in my family. My grandma had someone come onto her fenced property and cut down one of her beautiful trees for their Christmas tree. Unfortunately for them it fell as all good trees do into the fence which was electric. My grandparents sat in their Suburban all night with shot guns.


Given that I don't own a shot gun and I live in city limits, I was MAD!!!


It made me start thinking about Noah and how he sent a dove to see if there was dry land. I bet after the dove brought back that twig he shot it. That twig probably had the only ripe berries around and that bird had eaten them for himself.


I know you think I'm blowing this situation out of control a tiny bit, but you'd be mistaken because you see, this morning when I went out to care for my little garden I encountered THIS:



My sons heard me yelling and ranting like a lunatic (I didn't swear--out loud that is) and they came running to my rescue. Sweet boys. I guess they get their sense of honor from their grandparents.





(not related, but super cute)


And because you are all obsessed with my garden I wanted to show you a Ghost Aloe. Don't try and grow one of these at your house. Come visit me and bring poison--bird poison that is.


12 comments:

JenW said...

those tomatoes look AMAZING! i am so sorry those birds did them such damage! annoying! do scarecrows actually work? it's time for drastic measures!

Kelli said...

Audrey, I was seriously laughing out loud. Oh my gosh, you are hilarious! I'm sorry to hear about your tomatoes! As Gram would say, "those DAMN birds"! And then she would try and stomp the robins to death, maybe you need a new pair of stomping shoes!

Or, you could just put a net around your garden like Gram and Pop. If I see any good bird poison around here I will send you some ASAP!

Annie said...

So sorry to hear about your tomatoes. It is sad when all your hard work goes to the birds....

DONNA J. said...

Sorry about your tomatoes!!! I have had similar things happen and it's maddening!! In fact, Gram called today to say that she was outside searching for her shoes. I wondered...where are her shoes? The deer were eating her bushes (when it was almost dark, the night before) and she quickly took them off and chucked them at the deer. Hence, she had no idea where in the world her shoes were this morning when she needed them.

My tomatoes that looked like yours had tomato worms eat on them and slugs (just a thought). Those stupid slugs can eat almost a half of a tomato overnight!

Genetically, you naturally come by your love for your garden and your hot temper about those things that would dare touch your homegrown items. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree!

Sorry about your distress!!!

Tami said...

I Love it!!! You are hilarious!!!! You have birds and we have RABBITS that poop all over our lawn.....we've been hear 9 years now and we've tried it all.....we use to catch them and release them into the open spaces.....but now Scott wants to take them out.....shoot them....9 years ago I'd say no way baby, but now I'm all for it!!! Good luck!!!!

Sabina said...

I completely understand. I find it a little startling and disheartening at times to realize that I have such potential for anger, rage, aggression, etc..., but things eating and ruining my gardens certainly brings that out in me. Have you tried netting? We used to use that in Spokane to keep the birds off our blueberries.

kjirsti said...

"Gentle" eh? Hmm. Guess you didn't seem me after a squirrel dug up and ate a dahlia bulb from one of my pots- or heard me run out of the kitchen screaming when squirrels were digging up my peas, or. . .

Loved this. Oh gardening, it's joys and disappointments.

Lauren and Trevor said...

We have a sense of what you are going through. Our first crop of tomatoes fell victim to a friend's little boy who picked them and threw them at our fence. Now that was a tricky situation for venting anger. Just be grateful that you don't have tent worms that take out entire trees.

Lara said...

darn birds!

But I love the way your boys came to your rescue. So adorable.

Jacqueline said...

The first year our peach tree produced, the birds started pecking at them all so i put a net over it. But one of the birds got caught in it and died. I didn't like that so i learned to share. I cut off the pecked b=its and ate the rest.

JLJ said...

I feel your pain. My first lovely tomato was also pecked by birds. I was just as mad. It wouldn't have been as bad if I hadn't been watching that tomato reddening for a week, waiting to taste it.

Jessica Bradshaw said...

Almost every tomato I TRIED to grow this year looks exactly like yours. I had a few tantrums...and a meltdown when I watched from my kitchen window as a squirrel tore my one and only heirloom tomato from the plant and scurried away. I swore. A few times. I feel your pain. :(